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Phil Autelitano
Phil Autelitano

1K Followers

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Business & Marketing

·Pinned

Unagi Model One Scooter Review: Ten Things I Love And Ten Things I Don’t.

I just finished the first TWENTY miles on my new Unagi Model One E500 Dual Motor Electric Scooter and all in all, I LOVE IT. I simply can’t express how much freedom something as simple as an electric scooter allows me to enjoy. Back and forth to work, I don’t…

Electric Car

9 min read

Unagi Model One Scooter Review: Ten Things I Love And Ten Things I Don’t.
Unagi Model One Scooter Review: Ten Things I Love And Ten Things I Don’t.
Electric Car

9 min read


Published in

Business & Marketing

·Pinned

Don’t Sell Your Film to Netflix — Do THIS Instead.

A Better Way to Distribute Your Film or TV Show That Will Earn You More Than Netflix, Hulu and Other Streaming Platforms. By Phil Autelitano It’s been over seven years since I published my wildly popular, “How to Sell Your Film to Netflix, Hulu, Amazon and Others” article here on Medium. Since then, along with a few updated versions, it’s been quoted and shared and read millions of times across the Internet…

Filmmaking

14 min read

Don’t Sell Your Film to Netflix — Do THIS Instead.
Don’t Sell Your Film to Netflix — Do THIS Instead.
Filmmaking

14 min read


Published in

SCREW

·Aug 12

Smart Enough to Know It, Dumb Enough to Do It.

Sometimes I have to remind myself that I am absolutely 100% AS DUMB AS I LOOK. Remember when we were kids and we mashed all the foods in the cafeteria together — chocolate milk, mashed potatoes, salisbury steak, someone’s tuna sandwich, ketchup, mustard, green peas, ice cream, etc. — and…

Sales

5 min read

Fuck Ted And Fred — It’s Time to Take Your Shot
Fuck Ted And Fred — It’s Time to Take Your Shot
Sales

5 min read


Published in

SCREW

·Jul 30

Dirty Porn Facts “They” Don’t Want You to Know.

No, it’s not the latest book from Kevin Trudeau, it’s a collection of statistics gathered from porn friends and foes alike. It’s no secret the porn industry is HUGE and always has been. Prior to the Internet there’s really no telling how big it was, but thanks to technology we…

Porn

3 min read

Dirty Porn Facts “They” Don’t Want You to Know.
Dirty Porn Facts “They” Don’t Want You to Know.
Porn

3 min read


Published in

SCREW

·Jul 7

A Heart Broken Sober

Turns out she was just another in the long line of chicks with daddy issues or whatever issues that attract all these younger, often-unavailable (whether emotionally or physically or both) and/or married women to me. And I knew that going into it… I’m confident it’s wasn’t my good looks or…

Love

5 min read

A Heart Broken Sober
A Heart Broken Sober
Love

5 min read


Published in

SCREW

·May 3

That Time SCREW Revealed J. Edgar Hoover’s Dirty Little Secret.

It was the second worst day of J. Edgar Hoover’s life. On May 2, 1969, Screw published Issue #11 with our infamous cover story, “Is J. Edgar Hoover a Fag?” — publicly calling-out the nation’s first FBI director and hero of the Conservatives, personally, on his sexuality, and the entire…

History

5 min read

That Time SCREW Revealed J. Edgar Hoover’s Dirty Little Secret.
That Time SCREW Revealed J. Edgar Hoover’s Dirty Little Secret.
History

5 min read


Published in

SCREW

·Apr 7

SCREW YOU! #2,837 — There’s Gotta Be a Better Way to SHIT.

Sometimes I sit my butt on the toilet and it’s a nice, peaceful, clean bowel movement. Everything comes out perfectly, a wipe or two, and I’m ready to go — in and out, boom, done. Then there’s those times (usually when I’m in a hurry, or have something super-pressing to…

Technology

4 min read

SCREW YOU! #2,837 — There’s Gotta Be a Better Way to SHIT.
SCREW YOU! #2,837 — There’s Gotta Be a Better Way to SHIT.
Technology

4 min read


Published in

SCREW

·Mar 28

You Don’t Have to Be a Perv to Write For Screw But It Helps.

For more than fifty years a Screw byline has been one of the most coveted achievements among adult, erotic, and underground writers. It’s a true badge of honor, a symbol of arrival, acceptance, talent and influence reserved only for a select few. Screw writers have gone on to become best-selling…

Writing

2 min read

You Don’t Have to Be a Perv to Write For Screw But It Helps.
You Don’t Have to Be a Perv to Write For Screw But It Helps.
Writing

2 min read


Published in

SCREW

·Mar 24

H.U.M.A.N. — The One Acronym We All Share

I just thought of a new acronym for all the beautiful and unique peoples of this world: H-U-M-A-N. I think we should all consider using it. After all, aren’t gay rights and women’s rights and civil rights essentially all just HUMAN rights? There’s probably just as many cars on the…

Tolerance

5 min read

H.U.M.A.N. — The One Acronym We All Share
H.U.M.A.N. — The One Acronym We All Share
Tolerance

5 min read


Published in

SCREW

·Mar 14

Wacky Pope Natural Gender-Confirming Vatican Estercoraria Chairs!

Wacky Pope Natural Gender-Confirming Vatican Estercoraria Chairs! Wacky Pope Natural Gender-Confirming Vatican Estercoraria Chairs! Hi, I’m Phil Italiano, President and CEO of Phil Italiano’s Wacky Pope Natural Gender-Confirming Vatican Estercoraria Chair Emporium and Warehouse! …

Parody

2 min read

Wacky Pope Natural Gender-Confirming Vatican Estercoraria Chairs!
Wacky Pope Natural Gender-Confirming Vatican Estercoraria Chairs!
Parody

2 min read

Phil Autelitano

Phil Autelitano

1K Followers

a/k/a Phil Italiano, Publisher, Screw Magazine | www.screw.wtf | @PhilAutelitano

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